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a study of trolls by drk, a trollogist
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/11/2011 18:28:32
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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(got bored one day and drank too much millard light... came up with this)
first things first: what is a troll? a troll is a hairy creature that hides under bridges and harrasses people (not unlike al gore), but these trolls, are the internet ones that annoy players. this thread will help you better understand them so you may be able to combat them
a troll is typically human in appearance. they have all the anatomical and almost all of the physiological make ups of us humans. the only difference was is that trolls feed off human pain and suffering. exhibit a, here a troll is given a mic and access to xbox live, he has gained 200 lbs there. exhibit b, no mic. without a mic, the troll is starving to death. after 20 days. exhibit b died. therefore you can see without a means of cursing a player, the trolls will wither and die.
trolls like to annoy players, for they are a parasite. a parasite is a creature that feeds off hosts (in this case us human) and gives nothing in return (like you.... jking). the trolls like to bait their hosts, by talking about how they "did" their mothers (contrary to what they claim, most trolls are and forever will be virgins, unless they're sent to prison in which case they wont be virgins for long.) if no players take the bait, the troll with nearly die of starvation and leave. there is a course of dealing with trolls however called out-trolling. in this case a bigger better troll will out troll trolls. if the troll is pwned, he will leave, cry a huge fit, and his mother will buy him an xbox. however, that is one less troll on halo pc.
trolls tend to be about 4ft to even 6ft tall (6ft is unconfirmed) the ages of such range from 3 to 15 years old (however there was sighting of a troll that was 42 in age (this is a rare occurence, the specimen was killed and sent to the lab for study). a troll may try to compensate for its virgin status by laughing out how he pwned my mother (not realizing she's a little old lady whos hair is half white in color and skin is already getting old ladyish... haha hope he likes granmas )
now for the scary part, in an estimated 20-30 years, these are the people (if you live in america) that will run the country one day.... in otherwords, the kids that whine and complain about you owning them will be telling the russians that they "did" their moms. its even possible that they will even provoke a ww3, therefore i suggest we eliminate each and every troll from the earth, while cruel, it is part of natural selection, and in this case, i agree with darwin.
this has been a presentation by the anti-troll league of america |
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| ZA Buckshot |
Posted on 10/11/2011 18:36:59
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I got a big blue star for posting. i must be special
Posts: 1778
Joined: 15.11.10
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OMG THAT IS EPIC!!!! Well done, Inferno!
 
 
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| Phoenix |
Posted on 10/11/2011 19:04:31
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 2309
Joined: 16.04.11
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HILARIOUS! ROFLMAO |
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| za heystarface |
Posted on 10/11/2011 19:28:35
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Admin
Posts: 6130
Joined: 20.11.10
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1st... LOL @ Millard Light... is that like Miller Lite?
2nd... LOL @ Exhibit A and B!!! HAHAHAH!
3rd... LOL @ Troll will out-troll trolls! YAY!
4th... LOL @ virgins doing your mom, eww!
5th... LOL @ Bill Clinton totally being a troll. He trolled the shit outta this country, and Monica...
I <3 This! |
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/11/2011 20:03:33
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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za heystarface wrote:
1st... LOL @ Millard Light... is that like Miller Lite?
2nd... LOL @ Exhibit A and B!!! HAHAHAH!
3rd... LOL @ Troll will out-troll trolls! YAY!
4th... LOL @ virgins doing your mom, eww!
5th... LOL @ Bill Clinton totally being a troll. He trolled the shit outta this country, and Monica...
I <3 This!
i meant miller lite :'( |
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| ZA Buckshot |
Posted on 10/11/2011 20:04:43
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I got a big blue star for posting. i must be special
Posts: 1778
Joined: 15.11.10
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"I don't always drink beer. But when I do, I prefer Dos Equis."
"Stay thirsty, my friends."
#Swag XD
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| za heystarface |
Posted on 10/11/2011 20:41:57
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Admin
Posts: 6130
Joined: 20.11.10
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ZA Buckshot wrote:
"I don't always drink beer. But when I do, I prefer Dos Equis."
"Stay thirsty, my friends."
#Swag XD
What's that from? |
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| FC Wings |
Posted on 10/11/2011 20:44:21
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Super Admin
Posts: 4425
Joined: 16.11.10
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Beer commercials watch TV Gosh!!!
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| Phoenix |
Posted on 10/11/2011 20:46:51
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 2309
Joined: 16.04.11
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Lulz |
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| ZA Buckshot |
Posted on 10/11/2011 20:49:15
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I got a big blue star for posting. i must be special
Posts: 1778
Joined: 15.11.10
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It's from a television commercial for Dos Equis imported beer.
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| ZA numpty |
Posted on 10/11/2011 21:28:20
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 4430
Joined: 16.11.10
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I love it. |
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/12/2011 18:25:31
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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- Part 2
the lanquage of trolls
trolls (trolliest maximus) tend to speak in low pitch squeals (like high school freshmen  lolol) everything they say is pretty much offensive to "normals'" ears. thus driving a predator admin (adminus banyou) into a rage (like seniors in high school). the admin will prey on the trolls devouring any troll that doesnt get away. some trolls will try and use voice mods to conceal their voices, so as not to enrage their natural predator, like gazelles and lions on the sarengetti. trolls can speak in screeches, cries, and loud curses. somehow, they rape the holy internet toungue (english..... jking) and dilute it with words like pwn, and ijp[ogh. for a payment of just $1, you can help invest in the research of stopping trolls.
presentation by the anti-troll league of america- |
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| ZA numpty |
Posted on 10/12/2011 18:42:38
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 4430
Joined: 16.11.10
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I see one problem in this study. I have seen quite a few adminus banyou who are also trolliest maximus. How can you explain that? |
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| nygiants88 |
Posted on 10/12/2011 19:15:54
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Super Admin
Posts: 1707
Joined: 24.07.11
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i guess the trolliest maximus have infiltrated the adminus banyous
or maybe the adminus banyous are trolling the trolliest maximuses to show them what its like?
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/12/2011 20:14:12
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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some have managed to interbreed creating a hybrid called trollius adminus. these offspring are abominations, and should ,... BE SHOT ON SIGHT! |
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| ZA Bvigil |
Posted on 10/12/2011 20:18:31
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Admin
Posts: 2161
Joined: 15.11.10
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The problem is us trollius adminus are very good at avoiding deaths due to our extreme adminius powers
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| Rabidtaco |
Posted on 10/12/2011 20:32:14
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Senior Member
Posts: 305
Joined: 16.11.10
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OP is troll
Successful Troll is Successful
Member of ZÅ Feb. 19th, 2010 - May 15th, 2011
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| ZA numpty |
Posted on 10/12/2011 20:35:14
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 4430
Joined: 16.11.10
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ZA Bvigil wrote:
The problem is us trollius adminus are very good at avoiding deaths due to our extreme adminius powers
^ that |
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/12/2011 21:01:18
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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sarah palin: is that a deer? (looks at vigil a trollius maximus)
"takes aim with rifle and takes him down"
sarah palin: this will taste better than bambi's mom |
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| ZA Bvigil |
Posted on 10/12/2011 21:08:12
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Admin
Posts: 2161
Joined: 15.11.10
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Suddenly uses magical Adminius banyou powers to restore full health and says at maximum trollius maximus "You Mad" then walks away with swag
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