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if i were an evil dictator
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 17:35:34
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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if i were an evil dictator (after consolidating my base in america) i'd
1. confirm the loyalty of my citizens: if the citizens arent loyal, a labor camp or two will change that
2. create a secret police: spying on the citizens can never be a bad thing as well as a powerful army (tougher than navy seals and spetsnaz... i wish)
3. invade mexico under the pretext that mexico is sending drugs and cartels across the border then annex the area and take what resources it has, and train the pouplace to take bullets for my real army, ... wait: isnt that what we did with iraq?
4. using resources from my base and mexico, invade canada: too much oil and timber just lying there
5. invade cuba (bay of pigs invasion 2: this time we win  )
6. obviously by this time the un is bitching at me, so disvole it as an organization altogether (bomb the building and build a statue of me )
7. build camps in northern canada (all the dissenters have to go somewhere)
8. invade greenland and iceland (jump around)
9. from iceland, invade britain and pray to god that soap and price dont find out (see, everyone tries to invade britain in the south)
10. by this time a coalition of nations will be attacking me so: hire japanese yakuza, italian mafia, russian mafia and the like to attack their perspective countries' important areas, then betray them at the last second
11. invade france and norway (norway has too much iron, and france and lots of grain)
12. from there i will hire mercenaries to attack several locations throughout the world (creating a distraction, then track down said mercenaries and ki- i mean reprogram them)
13 from mexico, invade central and south america
14. invade southern europe and scandinavia
15. rest and see where things are (cool down period "no i wont invade anymo- hahaha i cant stop laughing)
16. prepare for winter, and watch russia's bear calvalry (countered with skeleton army)
17. invade middle east (gotta have oil) at the same time brainwashing conquered people and invading japan (where did they get voltron and godzilla?!)
18. after dealing with those damn japanese special forces (sailor moon, pokemon, digimon, the saiyan warriors and etc.) begin invading koreas
(yes i'm stretching resources)
19. build moon base to launch sattelite lasers from the sun onto several locations (moscow, australia, and africa just for the hell of it)
20. invade russia (in spring, damn winters)
21. hey, look at all the starving africans, lets give them "food" in return for mercenaries.... (haha they wish)
22. make more labor camps
23. invade oceania (australia and new zealand)
24. eliminate those who read this (joking? or am i?) |
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| ZA mortal |
Posted on 10/14/2011 18:10:39
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Wanker
Posts: 592
Joined: 18.11.10
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since you kill us last we have plenty of time to stop you once you start.
Don't bare the name if you can't play the game!
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 18:16:20
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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cough secret police cough |
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 18:19:06
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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:'( guards get them! |
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| ZA numpty |
Posted on 10/14/2011 19:17:20
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 4430
Joined: 16.11.10
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Can I join you in your conquest of the world? Please? I will be the head of the Secret Police. OR, I could be your Rudolf Hess (Hitlers 2nd in command) |
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| ZA lemonzandcandy |
Posted on 10/14/2011 19:19:14
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Numpty
Posts: 1209
Joined: 18.12.10
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when i saw this thread i thought it would be by adder(you know why xD).
-cod md- - terraria md?- |
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| ZA BlackAdder |
Posted on 10/14/2011 19:32:03
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Super Admin
Posts: 2419
Joined: 18.11.10
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idk if this is a compliment or not...
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 19:55:20
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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numpty, if you disobey my orders, you would be shot, survivors shot again, do you wish to continue?
no, you're not my 2nd in command, the commander of my secret army (tougher than spetsnaz and navy seals) is (dont wanna piss him off). |
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| ZA numpty |
Posted on 10/14/2011 20:13:39
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 4430
Joined: 16.11.10
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Yes, I wish to continue. I wish to be a part of this regime so that I live when the world is taken over by you because it sounds like you have a pretty fool proof plan. |
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| za heystarface |
Posted on 10/14/2011 20:36:53
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Admin
Posts: 6130
Joined: 20.11.10
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Interestin... |
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| ZA mortal |
Posted on 10/14/2011 20:43:03
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Wanker
Posts: 592
Joined: 18.11.10
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copy and pastes your plans all over the internet~ now your screw'd Drk! XD
if posts are each step america and china have attacked you after you invaded france. lol
Edited by ZA mortal on 10/14/2011 20:55:54
Don't bare the name if you can't play the game!
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 20:58:35
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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very well then, you will be an officer of the intelligence corps, your job will be to monitor internet (those bastards like to coordinate uprisings...) once you find dissent, direct the hacks to take the sites down and load the offenders with viruses to spread to their contacts and email addresses,
while you're doing that you will be supervised by big bob, one wrong move against the regime and... bye bye
i'll send monitors to watch the progress of stars and adder's baby (joking in rl though), watch him grow, and potentially mold him into a good right hand man until star and adder get him to betray me :'( |
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 21:00:11
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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dont worry mortal, those are false plans, did you honestly think i'd really let anyone in on my real plans |
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| ZA mortal |
Posted on 10/14/2011 21:05:53
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Wanker
Posts: 592
Joined: 18.11.10
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even so now every one is keeping tabs on you. bugs in your house, gps transmitters in your shoes, satellite imagery, spray painting your dog green. Rofl
Don't bare the name if you can't play the game!
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 21:09:42
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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meh, i can just counter hack those things then reverse it so i can keep tabs on them |
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 22:31:52
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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hobo wrote:
Alright, I Captain Price have attempted to take you and your Secret Police out with a swift attack. I failed, and I am held in your prison. I wish to join you drk! I can be you and numpty's assistant! I won't let you guys down! 
wth are you doing in prison?! "points to guard" you take him out and shoot him, wth is a hobo doing in my over crowded prison?!
guard: sir, our prisons arent overcrowded everyone is either at a labor camp or they've been shot
"points to another guard"
drk: shoot him too
guard: no sir dont i have three kids
drk: 3 laborers you mean |
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/14/2011 22:58:05
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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fine, you can join........... as front line infantry |
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| ZA mortal |
Posted on 10/15/2011 00:41:39
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Wanker
Posts: 592
Joined: 18.11.10
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~drk offers me the same choice~ i kick him in da nuts then try to escape only to get shot in the jugular vein.~ X_X
Don't bare the name if you can't play the game!
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| Drkinferno |
Posted on 10/15/2011 00:52:53
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Wanker
Posts: 908
Joined: 11.05.11
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mortal, i'd send you to a labor camp in norway to mine iron for me, just for that, where what rations you get is divided by 7.8 for each ton of iron you mine
no one... kicks me in dah nuts! |
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| The Hat of Love |
Posted on 10/15/2011 06:51:40
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ShawnPeezy
Posts: 9035
Joined: 31.07.11
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Drk, here is an altered, more realistic sequence of events:
if i were an evil dictator (after consolidating my base in america) i'd
1. get assassinated
my signature broke, here is a fox snek:
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